tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-181026582012-02-16T13:28:34.236ZMovie reviews and news by a man who never watches movies.Davenoreply@blogger.comBlogger581100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-61801171895660712832011-04-11T10:35:00.002+01:002011-04-11T10:35:48.216+01:00

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-36620970743694021952011-03-17T15:43:00.001Z2011-03-17T15:44:12.663Z

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-62981598874051865382011-02-28T17:41:00.000Z2011-02-28T17:42:06.980Z

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-1325313006034545192010-04-09T00:34:00.001+01:002010-04-09T00:36:33.094+01:00

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-74752568911897775562010-04-09T00:27:00.000+01:002010-04-09T00:31:03.648+01:00

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-62348718840671596312009-10-23T01:39:00.001+01:002010-04-09T00:13:17.467+01:00

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-24027088025269247682009-10-18T22:32:00.001+01:002010-04-09T00:14:14.772+01:00

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-76118449184811524772009-10-04T00:50:00.002+01:002010-04-09T00:16:50.150+01:00

you wouldn't like him when he's horny!

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-79345490797360835552009-10-01T23:41:00.001+01:002010-04-09T00:17:51.735+01:00

/mt2.jpg">

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-81276432328884817952009-09-23T01:32:00.003+01:002010-04-09T00:19:24.781+01:00

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-88185494478288795592009-09-18T15:25:00.001+01:002010-04-09T00:20:23.700+01:00

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-1518305684086413042009-09-13T20:19:00.001+01:002010-04-09T00:21:14.762+01:00

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-70075725190911548142009-09-13T18:01:00.002+01:002010-04-09T00:22:11.624+01:00

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-72285388409257150722009-08-08T23:59:00.001+01:002010-04-09T00:22:55.179+01:00

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-75621950705331984952009-08-08T23:53:00.001+01:002010-04-09T00:23:41.963+01:00

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-24158622579120160392009-08-02T22:10:00.003+01:002010-04-09T00:24:29.499+01:00

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-55688780595990758952009-08-02T22:05:00.002+01:002010-04-09T00:25:22.847+01:00

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-79102577244139280232009-08-02T22:01:00.001+01:002010-04-09T00:26:24.912+01:00

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-66099521449216004432009-08-02T01:21:00.001+01:002010-04-09T00:27:30.167+01:00

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-47328151141147616312009-08-02T01:19:00.001+01:002010-04-09T00:15:44.115+01:00

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-43093525386724753872009-08-02T01:11:00.000+01:002009-08-02T01:12:26.484+01:00

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-24265140646357854542009-04-03T22:33:00.001+01:002009-04-03T22:37:57.272+01:00

Ah, Ingrid Pitt!

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-56783430674670715842008-11-04T01:17:00.000Z2008-11-04T01:18:34.111Z

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-2428173585934028562008-10-31T00:27:00.001Z2009-08-02T22:27:32.548+01:00

He sure can boogie!

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-49707591066234131532008-10-29T14:23:00.001Z2009-08-09T00:06:01.809+01:00

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-72993363017236168282008-06-01T21:19:00.004+01:002008-06-01T21:26:33.568+01:00

Straight to DVD for the new Chuck Norris movie, in which our hero gets his holy orders....to hit people very hard. But they're all bad guys, so it's ok. Plus, he carries off that whole "Bride Of Christ" look, very well indeed!

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-53450301007928051032008-03-16T21:13:00.003Z2008-03-19T01:13:27.751Z

If Saul Bass had done the opening titles for Star Wars. Class stuff, made by bhilmers.

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-81374963297996942952008-02-18T22:14:00.003Z2008-02-18T22:16:35.086Z

Well, I like it.

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-3932532871579582622008-02-16T00:05:00.003Z2008-02-16T00:08:59.684Z

Davenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-12675614706159179002008-02-09T02:04:00.002Z2009-08-09T00:02:53.071+01:00

First post in how many months, and this is the best I can do!

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-72826974194021790442007-06-01T00:05:00.000+01:002007-06-01T00:08:25.041+01:00

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-61951719172052135212007-05-28T01:43:00.000+01:002007-05-30T22:09:30.064+01:00

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-52833724880888353172007-05-25T18:15:00.000+01:002007-05-28T01:54:56.665+01:00

...we get this!!

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-1176082802923681792007-04-09T02:36:00.000+01:002007-04-09T02:40:02.933+01:00

Oooer!

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-1161115990299556192006-10-17T21:09:00.001+01:002009-08-09T00:09:14.470+01:00

James Bond, movies, spoof, youtube, video

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-1160945557648810082006-10-15T21:46:00.000+01:002007-05-28T01:52:17.213+01:00

Tags: movie spoofs, humor, humour, youtube, movies, video

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-1160875164452703972006-10-15T02:11:00.001+01:002009-08-09T00:03:35.878+01:00

James Bond producers are to release a limited edition of dvd's aimed at insects. They're not really. I only wrote that so I could post this stupid picture. With a very bad pun. Sorry.Tags: humor , humour , movies , spoof , James Bond

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-1160785635538134662006-10-14T01:10:00.001+01:002007-05-28T01:54:56.665+01:00

Well, he wasn't getting any younger now, was he?Tags: humor , star wars , movies , spoof , humour

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-1160704289593725562006-10-13T02:48:00.000+01:002007-05-28T01:52:31.060+01:00

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-1160437856805654982006-10-10T00:50:00.000+01:002007-05-28T01:54:56.665+01:00

File under Youtube

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-1152930669883346842006-07-15T03:21:00.000+01:002006-07-15T03:31:09.893+01:00

Ridley Scott is to release a special "Easter Edition" of his 1979 sci fi classic "Alien". The films most infamous scene, the John Hurt/ chest/ yuk/ splat one, has been replaced by a nice cuddly bunny who brings the crew lovely chocolate eggs. And then jumps down Hurt's throat and rips out of his chest, huzzah!The film will be in cinemas this Christmas.Doh!!File under humor

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-1152909419319329252006-07-14T21:30:00.001+01:002009-08-09T00:04:05.904+01:00

Presenting the latest James Bond super-villain.Ernst Stavro Blairfeld!Humor

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-1152491705346867752006-07-10T01:25:00.001+01:002009-08-09T00:04:31.979+01:00

Producers of the new James Bond movie, have denied cutting costs on the new film after pictures of Bond's new car were leaked to the press. "That's the new Ferrari, honest guv", said an insider, who wished to remain un-named. It was Judi Dench actually, but don't say I told you or she'll get her gang on to me They're dead hard, and with all those spy gadgets I wouldn't stand a chance.

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-1148929684165868172006-05-29T20:00:00.000+01:002007-05-28T01:51:47.889+01:00

Without doubt, the scariest movie in the history of the world is "The Texas Jigsaw Massacre. This movie is so scary, grown men gouged their own eyes out, so as not to have to watch the unfolding horror! Of course, it didn't scare me, but then, I am the hardest man on the interweb.........what was that? Did you hear something?.....MUMMY!!!

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-1148656251092422112006-05-26T16:01:00.000+01:002006-05-26T16:10:51.093+01:00

Hmmm, looks like my kind of movie!

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-1144719775938899932006-04-11T02:26:00.001+01:002009-08-09T00:05:00.676+01:00

In a shock move, that Craig fella has been sacked as James Bond. His place will be taken by small plastercine penguin, Pingu. In an exclusive interview, Pingy said, "I cant wait to get me wings on all those Bond babes, phwooooarrrr!"This is quite an exciting time for plastercine actors, what with Wallace and Gromit & Tom Cruise enjoying celluloid success.The new Bond movie, "You Only Eat Fish",

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-1134166378555850012005-12-09T22:03:00.001Z2009-08-02T22:21:52.657+01:00

The classic 1969 Beatles documentary, "Let It Be", has been remade, with cows taking the parts of the fab four. Director Brian Grim, says he used cows because "god told me to, and you don't argue with the big fella upstairs". This will be Grim's first and only film, as he recently decided to concentrate all his energies on his latest project, Grims Pies and Burgers. None of the stars of the movie

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-1133311505043400052005-11-30T00:31:00.001Z2009-08-02T22:28:46.430+01:00

George Lucas has announced plans for a new Star Wars spin-off movie. "Darthur Daley", will follow the dark lord of the sith, as he sets up as a used land speeder sales-man. New characters, such as Terry McKenobi and Dave the cantina barman, will be joined by old favourites, like Darth Sidious, who despite not appearing, will be mentioned several times as, "sith indoors".Long time fans of the

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-1132971314190781622005-11-26T02:09:00.001Z2009-08-02T22:32:40.617+01:00

Penguins running about!Walrus's putting the shot!An arctic fox with a javelin through it's head!More penguins running about!For the love of Britney, how much better can it get?(Certificate PG, contains mild waddling.)

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-1132881896565227482005-11-25T00:51:00.001Z2009-08-02T22:31:31.357+01:00

Dirk Snidewinder's classic 1958 pulp novel, "Punish Me With Custard", is finally getting the old Hollywood treatment. Described by first time director Rodrigo Norkus as, "a steamy tale of love, lust, betrayal and milk based desserts", and by producer Yehudi Felch as, "a delightful two bedroom cottage with exquisite views of the Gobi desert", it goes into production early next year. No big names

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-1132688773996366272005-11-22T19:37:00.000Z2006-05-26T23:55:31.736+01:00

Jude Law is to take the title role, in the new "brit flick", Fuzz Aldrin. Law plays Edwin "Fuzz" Aldrin, a copper in 1960's London, who is offered and accepts a transfer to the moon. The film's plot revolves around PC Aldrin's attempts to combat lunar crime, while a completely random swinging sixties soundtrack drones away in the background. In reduced gravity.

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-1132535593939705242005-11-21T00:55:00.001Z2009-08-02T22:26:49.553+01:00

Another first for Cinemageddon, as we get our grubby mits on an exclusive pic from the new "Batman Retires" movie! The film, which stars Sean Connery as an octogenarian caped crusader, concerns Batmans attempts to get to the post office to get his pension. Clint Eastwood co-stars as the incontinent villain, The Piddler.The movie, the first to be directed by a horse, will be released to coincide

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-1131404556379366222005-11-07T22:49:00.000Z2006-05-26T23:56:12.013+01:00

Sylvester Stallone is making a comeback as Rambo, in "Rambo Peep". This time around, he has to rescue some sheep from Vietnham. What are sheep doing in Vietnham? Doing their bit to end the red commie threat of course. The film is due out next year, and with the tagline "Coming home with their tails wagging behind them, is not an option!", I for one can't wait! But I'll have to. Unless I build a

Davenoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-1130714306135881972005-10-30T22:46:00.001Z2009-08-02T22:39:59.245+01:00

Steven Spielberg thinks penguins are pretty groovy. In an interview published in this weeks edition of "South Pole Weekly", the beardy film bloke says they're his favourite kind of bird. "I always try to include some penguins in all of my films, but the editors always cut them out, the bastards." It seems, however, that he may finally get his way, as production is about to get underway on the

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-1130685485355811192005-10-30T15:04:00.001Z2009-08-02T22:42:37.263+01:00

Big news from the recent sale of movie memorabilia at Sotheby's in London, where a rare autographed photo of legendary 1930's ape actor, Billy "King" Kong sold for over £2.00!!! Despite acheiving huge success, his brief career came to an abrupt end in 1939, when he got bored and decided to do someting else. Went into public relations I think, but don't quote me on that.

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-1129997152831562142005-10-22T17:05:00.000+01:002006-08-14T23:45:30.063+01:00

Angelina Jolie plays Queen Victoria in "Vicky - Queen Of Time". The movie's plot centres on the Queens attempt to rescue her beloved pet daschund Herman, voiced by Jeremy Irons, from the clutches of the evil time travelling Doctor Thrang, played by Alan Rickman. Angelina's sidekick in the move, a cgi monkey called Nutso, is being voiced by famous physicist Stephen Hawking. Hawking's performance

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-1129919005091348382005-10-21T19:20:00.000+01:002006-05-26T23:57:45.993+01:00

I've decided I'll have bogus movie news stories too, a bit of satire you see. Is this fun, or what?

Davenoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-18102658.post-1129852147269895542005-10-21T00:41:00.000+01:002006-05-26T23:58:48.393+01:00

And as such, I haven't set foot in a cinema since 1999 (Star Wars Episode 1! I'm still in therapy!) So, what I've decided to do is, write movie reviews without watching them, I mean, I know the title, I know who's in it, how hard can it be? So if any movie stars, directors, studio execs or popcorn manufacturers stumble on this blog, please don't sue me, it's just a bit of fun.

Davenoreply@blogger.com3